Thursday, June 20, 2013

An Actor's Plea

Dear Industry Professionals - Casting Directors, Directors, Producers etc.,

I realize I may be shooting myself in the foot by saying this, but I feel like it needs to be said.

I find it interesting that actors, in many ways, fall at the bottom of the Hollywood totem pole.  And yet, without actors, this industry wouldn't exist.

Here's what I know:  I know that, as an actor, it's my job to be prepared.  I need to show up on time and with a positive attitude, with strong, interesting choices, with confidence, and memorized sides.  I should look the part, and dress accordingly.  I should probably have a headshot on me.  I should allow for traffic and parking.  But I also know that I'm a human and therefore request the following 3 completely reasonable things:

1 - You expect me to be on time, and that's fine.  I don't think it's unrealistic for me to expect the same thing from you.  I know things happen, and being 10-15 minutes behind is no big deal.  However, when I have to wait more than an hour (and I've waited over 2 hours on occasion), that's unacceptable.  I'm trying to balance a day job - sometimes more than one - with auditions, and a social life, and sleep, and I can't always take 2 hours out of my day because casting may or may not be behind.  Please have more respect for my time than that.  If not, then please don't complain when I'm half an hour late because President Obama is in town.  And if you are ridiculously behind, I might suggest that keeping us posted on what's happening, and having a plate of cookies for auditioners goes along way toward alleviating the understandable frustration we're feeling.

2 - If I forget my headshot, don't freak out.  I don't think I've had anyone ask for a headshot in the last six months, so you'll forgive me if I've gotten out of the habit of carrying one around with me.  I know I should, but sometimes I don't.  It's not the end of the world.  You have me on film.  I promise that I'll do my best to make strong enough choices in the audition that a headshot is basically pointless anyway.

3 - Wardrobe expectations should consist of what I might reasonably have in my closet.  I'm not a wardrobe department, so things like "lab coat", "police uniform", or "chef's coat" are, in my opinion, not my job to provide.  If you want to see that, have it available for use at the audition. I can do things like "casual" or "business" or even "western", but if you want something specific, please ask the wardrobe department to provide it.

As an actor that is nowhere near the A-list, I feel like I am forced to be a Hollywood doormat.  I just have to nod and smile and be nice.  I can't express any legitimate concerns or frustrations for fear of being "that actor".  However, you constantly tell me that we are all on equal footing and so I'm requesting these things as a colleague.  Please consider them.

Sincerely,

Struggling actors everywhere


Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Chastity's back y'all!

I present the 4th Annual Chastity Party:  Dipping Chips Instead of Hips.

The spread and peeps gettin' crafty






First prize crafty winner - a limerick:

(There once was a young man called Cassidy
Who decided to practice chastity
He lasted 'til noon
When some girl named June
Offered to give him a hand with it.)

Second prize - pipe cleaner warning sign:


First prize chastity belt:


Second Prize Chastity Belt:



White Elephants were sparse this year.  Here was mine:




White Elephants also included such gems as party poppers, and a latch-hook kit.  Thanks to everyone who participated, it was a great evening.  Already looking forward to next year!  Though, of course, everyone hopes to be ineligible by marriage by that time.  ;)
A special shout-out to Sister Tullis from the ward for bringing by her married-person contribution.  Thanks for your support!  And for the delicious dessert bars.  
Stay chaste my friends!